youre lurking in front of me
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Randomize
