it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
