Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
Randomize
