I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize