I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Randomize
