What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
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