Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Randomize
