There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
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