1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
Randomize
