so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Randomize
