is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Randomize