He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
