Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
His hands were made for my vagina.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Randomize