even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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