real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
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