So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize
