Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
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