I hate all girls vehemently.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Randomize
