i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
Randomize