Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
