he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
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