So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
