and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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