Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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