I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
