YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
