You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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