You really coming over, don't trick.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Randomize
