VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
Randomize