he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
Randomize
