In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Randomize
