It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
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