Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Randomize
