Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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