He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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