I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Randomize
