Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
I see more hoeing in ur future
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
