Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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