Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
