So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize
