Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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