She went from zero to smokin in five shots
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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