New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
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