I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
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