When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
