You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
Randomize
