Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Are we still banned from the library?
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Randomize
