I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Randomize
