The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
