Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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