Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Randomize
